Silence in the Garden?

I'd like to hear what Jesus did in the Garden.  As he poured our his heart before God, heavy with death, lonely and abandoned.

found at: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/karenspearszacharias/tag/garden-of-gethsemane/

³²  And they went to a place called Gethsemane. And he said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” ³³ And he took with him Peter and James and John, and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. ³⁴ And he said to them, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch.”^{[d] 35} And going a little farther, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. ³⁶ And he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” ³⁷   Mark 14: 32-37

In a dream I saw myself loosing a child.  I cried out in my dream- "No God, take this cup from me! Take it from me!  I cannot drink from this cup! I know you can take this away from me."  And in my dream I realized that I was crying only half of what Jesus did.  I could not bring myself to say "But not my will be done, only let Your will be done".  And I woke up.

Have you ever felt like that?  Like you're going through life just kicking and screaming saying "No, not this cup! Take it away God!"
  
I find myself desperately craving the comfort of God.  I want Him to come in and answer me and take away the cup I have been given because it is too much for me.  I wonder what Jesus heard that night, while praying?  Was it comfort from His Heavenly Father? Or silence?   We know that He felt forsaken on the cross, and alone in the garden.  Yet in His heart He said, "Not my will but Yours."  

I drag my fearful/resentful/angry soul through time and space kicking and screaming and I reject the cup my Lord has given me.  Do I also reject the joy of His resurrection?

I cannot come to life lest I first die. 

Not my will Lord, but let Your will be done.